


Roommate Woes

by Nightpounce



Category: NDU, Nightmare Dork University - Fandom, Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, i'm sorry if this is super confusing!, poor jack sickle...he's very broken, proto is really creepy, room mates, the general thinking was what could be more awesome than one Pitch? MORE PITCHS!, trying to gather all my drabbles for this au into one place
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-27
Updated: 2014-11-27
Packaged: 2018-02-27 05:13:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2680409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightpounce/pseuds/Nightpounce
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Pitchiner and Pitch have to go away for a week, they ask Jack to dog-sit. Proto is strangely happy about this arrangement.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> OK! So, Nightmare Dorks University is an au based around the Wangst Comics drawn by ask-pitchs-wardrobe on Tumblr (http://ask-pitchs-wardrobe.tumblr.com/) - you really should go check them out right now (SO GOOD!).
> 
> Mira-eyeteeth helpfully compiled a blog just for this au and the adorable arseholes that make it up (Kozmotis Pitchiner, Piki Black, Pitch Black, Proto and Jack Sickle). You can find the history for this AU here;  
> http://mira-eyeteeth.tumblr.com/NDU
> 
> This is a very loose AU, people tend to pick and choose what they want to be canon and what they don't. Be warned, this AU has a tendency to eat people (it's all mira's fault i got dragged in!!) and it's full of amazingly talented artists and writers. It also includes Proto's pet taxidermied ferret.....which he leaves in various places around the shared apartment, claiming Mr Pickles likes to watch. The others are less than impressed by this behaviour >>
> 
> This was the first piece of fanfic I wrote for the fandom soo....apologies in advance XD

Pitchiner woke slowly, the sound of his alarm penetrating the haze of his dreams. He groaned, rolling over and pressing his face harder into his pillow even as he flailed blindly in the general direction of the noise.

Nope, it was too early to be awake…JESUS wasn’t awake this early, so why should he have to be?! He’d barely slept as it was…getting home late thanks to a lacrosse club party, attempting to defuse his firecracker of a boyfriend – yes, he DID know what time it was, no he wasn’t attempting to give Pitch grey hairs, why would he be sleeping on the couch when he had a perfectly good bed? Unless this was a kink that Pitch wanted to – Pitch’s door slamming in his face had been the end of that conversation – so why the fuck had he set his alarm for this ungodly hour?

Oh right….he wanted to shower without the possibility of their resident lanky creeper invading the bathroom and attempting to force feed him his latest contribution to the world of warfare cooking. Swearing to himself and flinging the covers aside, Pitchiner stumbled around the room collecting clean clothes – he really should try putting his laundry away instead of just flinging it onto the nearest raised surface – and headed for the bathroom. The shit you had to do in this house to avoid food poisoning was ridiculous.

One creeper-free shower later, Pitchiner slouched into the kitchen and headed for the coffee machine. The easiest way to smooth Pitch’s ruffled feathers was to make sure his smarmy coffee was brewed and waiting for him to make an appearance. Pitchiner planned on getting laid later that day and the fewer ruffled feathers from the night before the easier that would be.

The hairs on the back of his neck stood on end and he whirled around, anticipating a terrifying breakfast muffin at face height to greet him and being thrown when he discovered an eerily empty kitchen…..where WAS Proto anyway?! That freak actually LIKED to be up before noon and would usually be sitting at the kitchen table, sipping his herbal tea and flipping through the Obituaries section of the newspaper when Pitchiner stumbled in. Shrugging and deciding to just enjoy a rare, NORMAL morning and not dwell on unimportant questions like “if Proto wasn’t there, where WAS he?”, Pitchiner poured the now brewed coffee into Pitch’s favourite mug and went to see if his afternoon plans couldn’t be brought forward.

………………………………….

Across the town in his small, quiet university dorm room, Jack shifted restlessly in his sleep. It was colder than he expected this morning, enough that he was grateful for his thicker, winter pajamas. It was almost as if he’d forgotten to close his window when he went to bed but that couldn’t be the case, he was always careful about such things. He rolled over, snuggling closer to the warmth beside him, sighing as a long arm wrapped around his waist and drew him against a lean torso.

Jack’s brow furrowed, wasn’t he in his dorm room? He didn’t remember spending the night at the apartment…no, he’d decided to stay at the campus last night, alone and distraction free, needing to work on a project that was due later that day…

Blinking his eyes open, Jack stared at an expanse of horrendously-colored sweater in front of his nose, the arm at his waist tightening as he stiffened, gaze traveling upwards.

“Good Morning Jack, bad dreams? You were quite restless throughout the night, is that common? Did you know continuous, disrupted sleep can contribute to anxiety disorders?”

Proto smiled, fishing around at the side of the bed with his free hand before lifting it and brandishing a flask. “How do you feel about a wheat-grass smoothie? I’m sure you’d find its soothing properties beneficial.”

Jack’s scream startled a flock of birds from the trees across campus.

…………………………………………

The following week, a water pipe on the floor above Jack’s dormitory room burst, flooding the communal bathroom and soaking through the floor of the surrounding rooms. In the interest of student safety, those staying in the rooms directly below the affected area were asked to move out temporarily whilst repairs were carried out.

When the decision had been made, Jack’s anxiety had soared. How would this affect his grades? He couldn’t move into one of the shared rooms, the very thought of such close quarters and constant interaction had his shoulders hunching, arms moving to hug himself as his breathing began to speed up. Still staring at the message board Jack failed to notice the figure approaching him.

“Hey Jack!” Pitchiner’s heavy hand landed on his shoulder, causing the smaller boy to start violently. “What’s up? You look stressed, well…more stressed than usual.”

“O-oh no, i-it’s nn-nothing real-ly, I wa-was j-just…”

Pitchiner lent forward, hand cupping the back of Jack’s neck as he read the notice on the board, effectively preventing the other from bolting.

“Huh….man that really sucks!” He fixed Jack with a sympathetic look “They making you all move into other rooms whilst they do the repairs?” Jack nodded miserably, staring at the floor as the larger student studied him.

“Well, lucky for you, Pitch and I are away for the rest this week!” Jack whipped his head up to stare at him. “I’ve been asked to help a relative move house and Pitch wanted some quiet time to work on his script. Classes are pretty light this week so we’ll be leaving early tomorrow.” Pitchiner slung his arm around Jack’s shoulders and steered the younger boy down the corridor. “Come on, I’ll help you grab your stuff, you may as well stay over tonight as well.”

“A-are you s-sure? I d-don’t wa-want to be a b-bother.”

“Course I’m sure! Also, this means I don’t have to worry about leaving Tarminator alone with Proto! I don’t trust that freak not to try feeding my baby that weird shit he calls food. At least now I know you’ll be there as well.”

Tucked under Pitchiner’s arm, Jack’s face turned several shades paler.

………………………………………………

So far, the week had been going well. Pitch had raised very little fuss over Jack staying in the apartment whilst they were gone, seemingly happy to know an extra pair of eyes would be there to ensure Tarminator didn’t decide to use every available piece of furniture as a chew toy.

Proto had simply smiled, expressed his condolences for the burst pipe – so unusual, the plumbing in that building being relatively new and well maintained – and assured Jack he was looking forward to his company over the coming days. Pitch and Pitchiner had traded concerned looks over the top of Jack’s head at that before Pitchiner had offered the use of his own room.

“My door has multiple locks Jack, Tarminator likes to sleep in my room as well, you’ll be FINE!”

Closing the door to the bathroom, engaging the lock and dropping his clean clothes in a pile by the door, Jack turned on the water and stripped off, giving the water time to warm up. Stepping under the hot spray and making sure the shower curtain was properly closed Jack closed his eyes and relaxed. He’s just finished washing his hair and was reaching for the loofah when the shower curtain was flung aside and a looming form blocked the light.

“Jack, do you have any additional allergies to those listed on your medical records?”

Proto stared down at Jack, waiting patiently as the boy tried to find his voice, obviously too shocked to even attempt covering himself.

“Wha – what?! I…n-no? I don’t th-think s-so?” Jack’s gaze darted around Proto to the open door “I th-thought I…”

“Locked the door?” Proto finished helpfully, smiling as Jack stared up at him with wide eyes. “You did. Don’t worry though, it was no problem.” Stepping back and starting to pull the shower curtain back into place Proto paused, “So white really is your natural hair colour? That’s very interesting, enjoy your shower Jack.”

Jack was still frozen under the hot water, mouth hanging open and eyes wide when the bathroom door swung shut again.

…………………………………

Five minutes later, Proto was just scraping the last of his carefully chopped ingredients into the blender, two glasses ready and waiting beside it, when Jack’s terrified scream rattled the glass in the cabinet doors. Oh yes, maybe he should have said something to Jack as he was leaving the bathroom. Mr Pickles did so like to watch.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Jack, he is not enjoying his stay as much as Proto is enjoying his company.

Jack yawned, straightening from his slouch and leaning back slightly as he stretched his arms high over his head. His eyes were sore, the words on the page he was reading blurring no matter how many times he blinked. Rolling his shoulders before placing his pen on the table beside his books, Jack pushed back his chair and padded into the kitchen, maybe a glass of water would help. Standing on tiptoes and reaching to pull a glass from the cabinet, Jack glanced at the oven clock. It was late, well past midnight...no wonder he was having trouble concentrating.

Biting his lip, Jack glanced back at the kitchen table, his books and notes scattered across its surface. He really wasn’t making much progress now, maybe it would be better to go to bed and continue working on his questions after a few hours of sleep. His classes weren’t until later that day, so if he set his alarm he’d have plenty of time to finish them before heading back to campus. Making up his mind, Jack replaced the glass before picking up the kettle, filling it at the tap before placing it back in its cradle and turning it on. A hot drink should help him warm up and he had always found the smell of peppermint tea soothing. He didn’t have a kettle in his dorm room so hot tea before bed was one of the things he liked most about staying at the apartment. 

Moving back to the table, Jack closed his books and reordered his notes, stacking them neatly at the far end of the table. Proto liked to read the newspapers in the morning and Jack didn’t want to leave his belonging where they would be in the way, he could always relocate to the coffee table if space became an issue. Actually, maybe he’d do that anyway...he didn’t want to bother the older student and he was still highly uncomfortable in the man’s presence. 

It wasn’t that Proto was unfriendly, quite the opposite but Jack had found a friendly and interested Proto was even more terrifying than an indifferent Proto. An interested Proto would appear suddenly, looming over Jack and smiling down at him, asking him questions about his day - how were his classes? Did he get the mark he’d hoped for on his paper? Had he seen the notice regarding the cafeteria and the recent cases of food poisoning? Jack found all the questions unnerving, shoulders hunching instinctively as he struggled to answer each one but Proto was always patient, giving the smaller boy time to think and respond, eyes tracking each little twitch and nervous motion. 

Actually, the food poisoning cases at the cafeteria had been a little worrying, the numbers high enough to warrant closing the premises for an inspection and thorough cleaning. Fortunately for Jack, staying at the apartment meant he could simply buy groceries and keep them in the fridge, making his lunch when he needed it instead of having to buy it on campus. He could even save himself time by making it the night before, packing it into his bag before he left for the day. He was still a little confused as to why Proto had insisted on handing him his lunch over the last few days, being perfectly capable of collecting it from the fridge himself but Proto had waved away his weak protests.

“Oh no Jack, it’s really no trouble, I was getting something out for myself anyway, enjoy your sandwich.”

He’d been a little worried but his food had tasted fine so he’d decided not to dwell on it. Sighing, Jack opened a notebook, tore a piece of paper free and grabbed his pen. Thinking about food had reminded him that he needed to go to the shops later that day, he was running low on bread and he’d noticed the container of Proto’s favourite chai tea was almost empty. Picking up a refill seemed like a good way to say thank you for letting him stay at the apartment while his dorm was repaired. 

Listening to the kettle bubble in the kitchen, Jack noted down the things he needed to pick up in terms of groceries, stopping to check his list and adding a few items needed to clean the apartment – he could clean on Friday evening before Pitchiner and Pitch returned on Saturday. Pausing, Jack realised he could no longer hear the water in the kettle. Placing his list on top of his other papers, Jack turned and walked straight into Proto’s chest, rebounding with a startled yelp and whimpering when his lower back caught the edge of the table. Large hands caught his shoulders and held him steady as Proto blinked down at him.

“My apologies Jack, did I startle you? Are you alright?”

“So-sorry! I did-dn’t hear y-you come i-in! I – no, n-no I’m ok th-thank you” Jack rubbed his lower jack, wincing slightly at the bruise he felt forming. Jack’s eyes snapped back to Proto’s face as the hands on his shoulders squeezed, Proto offering a gentle smile.

“Are you sure? That looked painful…you should be careful! Who knows what people might think if they saw you sporting a bruise resembling the edge of a table across your lower back.”

Chuckling at the expression on Jack’s face, Proto turned, one hand moving to press between Jack’s shoulder blades as he ushered the smaller boy into the kitchen. 

“Don’t worry, I’ve developed a cream that can help with that. Works wonders in reducing the discolouration and numbing the pain…Piki and Pitch both swear by it. I’d be happy to help you apply it.” 

Proto released Jack, ignoring the boy’s stutters and moving to the bench where two mugs sat beside a large glass teapot. Picking up the teapot and pouring the gently steaming liquid into the two mugs he turned, placing the pot back on the bench before picking up a mug and holding it out to Jack with an expectant smile.

“Tea?”

Jack stared at the mug, shoulders hunching and expression reminiscent of that found on the faces of condemned men. He chewed on his lower lip, eyes flickering from the mug, up to Proto’s face and back again.

“I..uh…I thin-nk m-maybe it wo-would-d b-be best if I …”

“Did you know herbal tea is often recommended for people suffering sleeping disorders?” Jack blinked.

“You’ve been restless these last few nights, very few deep sleep periods at all! Just the stress of sleeping in an unfamiliar bed I’m sure…a deep sleep would do you good.”

Proto took a sip of his tea, continuing to watch Jack over the lip of his mug as he leaned his hip against the counter. Looking miserable, Jack raised his own mug and took a hesitant sip, pulling back to stare at the contents in surprise.

“Thi-is actually tastes p-pretty ni-nice.” He took another, slightly larger sip.

“Of course, I made the blend myself. Peppermint is one of the main ingredients.”

Jack continued to take little sips, blowing on the liquid in between as he tried to cool it. 

“Thank you f-for the t-tea but I sh-should really h-head to be-bed.”

Proto nodded, gesturing for Jack to precede him down the hallway as he paused to flick the kitchen lights off.

“Don’t worry about the pot, I’ll be awake for a while yet.”

Jack paused at the door to Pitchiner’s room, pushing it open slightly before craning his neck up to meet the taller man’s eyes.

“Sorry if I dis-sturbed y-you and than-nk you again f-for the tea.”

Pushing his own door open, Proto looked over his shoulder and offered Jack one last smile.

“Oh you didn’t disturb me, I was working on a …personal project. Did you know they have recently discovered a new species of Amazonian tree frog? Fascinating creatures! They secrete a substance from their skin – it’s virtually undetectable - that can cause total paralysis in minutes, coupled with highly vivid hallucinations.”

Jack’s stared at Proto, eyes wide and unblinking. 

“In trace amounts, I believe it would be a wonderful relaxation aid. Enjoy your tea Jack, I hope it helps you sleep more soundly tonight.”

Proto’s door swung shut as Jack’s horrified gaze swung down to regard his half-finished mug of tea.

…………………………………………………………

Saturday morning saw Pitchiner and Pitch struggling towards the door of the apartment, arms laden with containers, bags and baskets.

“My god! Why did your mother feel the need to give us this much food!?” Pitch groaned.

“Hey! I’m a growing boy, besides –“ Koz glanced down when Pitch cut him off.

“Yes well, you will be once you devour this!”

“BESIDES Beanpole, most of this food is for you.” Koz smirked as Pitch spluttered.

“Wha? Me?! Why me??”

“Mum was convinced you lived on coffee and air.” The larger boy ignored his boyfriend's scoff. “She also said you had a fine arse and gorgeous legs.” Pitch tripped, almost dropping the containers he was carrying, “but that you might break if you didn’t gain some weight.”

Koz grinned down at his flustered boyfriend.

“I see where you get it now…just open the door before I drop these, you idiot!”

“Yes, dear” shifting his burdens to one arm, Koz fished for his keys with his free hand. “Hey, do you think Snowflake’s ok? You don’t think anything weird happened do you?” 

“Snow? Oh…Jack…I’m sure he’s fine! It was only a week.” Pitch waved off his concern.

“A week alone with Proto is a long time, Pitch.” The key slipped into the lock and he twisted, grinning at the sound of Tarminator’s excited barks.

“oh please, Jack had classes! I’m sure Proto just ignored him.”

The door was pushed open as they struggled inside, their ankles besieged by an excited pug.

“Tarminator! Did ya miss me? So, you don’t think we have to worry about a humanoid Mr Pick…..oh hey! Jack! How’s it going Buddy?” Koz smiled, addressing the smaller boy he'd spotted.

Jack was facing away from the door, back resting against the armrest of the couch, knees pulled up to his chest.

“Snowcone? You ok?” Koz stood, a hint of concern entering his voice.

Exchanging worried looks with Pitch, he dropped the remaining bags to the floor, food abandoned on the coffee table as they hurried forward.

“HOLY FUCK!! HE’S BEEN TAXIDERMIED!” Koz stared in horror at Jack’s vacant expression.

“Don’t be ridiculous” Proto’s smooth voice carried across the room as he entered, strolling across to the couch.

“Yes, even Proto would balk at doing that to Jack!” Pitch seemed to register Proto’s presence at his side a moment later, taking a hasty step away. 

“Indeed, what a waste, there are still so many interesting things to do and discuss. No need to rush things.” Proto smiled, leaning forward to tuck the blanket off the back of the couch around Jack.

“It seems Jack’s sleep-depravation and anxiety has made him for susceptible to the effects of some of the stronger supplements he recently started taking with his meals.”

Koz and Pitch stared at him.

“You certainly have to agree they do seem to have had the desired, calming effect."

Proto sidestepped as Koz lunged.


End file.
